OK, you lunatics, UConn has released its men’s basketball nonconference schedule. Circle these two dates on your calendars: December 18 and January 3.
On December 18, our boys will face off against evil powerhouse and alma mater of Christian Laettner, Duke, at the IZOD Center in East Rutherford, NJ. The last time UConn played Duke, those goddamn Devils won in the 2009 NIT Tip-Off Championship game. Of course, we won in 1999 and 2004 in the Final Four so fuck those guys. (Don’t talk to me about 1990. I’m still not over that.) That arena can seat just over 20,000 people. I expect 19,999 of them to be UConn fans. So get it together, Husky Nation, and buy all of the tickets.
On January 3, the Huskies head down to Gainesville to play Florida. You remember what happened the last time we played them. And the time before that. Florida lost three games last year, and two of them were against UConn. Expect the Gators to be out for blood.
UConn will face the Longhorns of the University of Texas at home on November 30. Texas won 24 games and made it to the Sweet Sixteen of the tourney, so this could be a resume booster for the Huskies.
The final regular season, non-conference game will be on January 17 at Stanford. That team, whose mascot, inexplicably, is a tree, made it to the Sweet Sixteen last season.
The Huskies will be competing in the Puerto Rico Tip-Off, which runs from November 20 to the 23. They will definitely face the College of Charleston, and, in the second round, either Dayton or Texas A&M. Dayton had an improbable run in the NCAA Tournament last season, first doing God’s work by sending Syracuse packing and then winding up in the Elite Eight. On the final day, UConn will play George Mason, West Virginia, New Mexico, or Boston College. As much as I love beating those obnoxious Eagles from Chestnut Hill (THE SCHOOL IS NOT ACTUALLY IN BOSTON), I might enjoy beating George Mason more, because there was this one game that I’ve blocked from my memory and I think they were in it and we lost.
The rest of the schedule is basically Husky Chow, including several schools my friends went to (Southern Connecticut in the first exhibition game, Central Connecticut and Bryant). I appreciate UConn giving me this opportunity to mock my friends and lord our superiority over them.
We also play Yale, which the press release LOLingly refers to as an “in-state rival,” Assumption College and Coppin State. I recall seeing Coppin State in some brackets, so they might actually play basketball there.
Venues for the home games haven’t been announced, but if that Texas game isn’t at Gampel there should be a riot. Not that I would ever incite a riot. Violence and destruction are bad. So is playing huge games at the XL Center. I’m just sayin’.
The complete schedule, which will include the conference games, will be released later.
